One of the strange decisions I came to eventually was this: I would have lots of children (6 to be exact) just in case one of them died.
Fortunately, common sense prevailed and after 3 kids we closed up shop.
Not that I wasn’t capable of loving more kids! It was more of a practical matter to do with the size of the house, the size of the car and the size of the wallet.
A protection mechanism
The decision to have lots of children was put in place to protect me from suffering. Now that I have children I know that it would not work anyway. No matter how many children I had, losing any one of them would be devastatingly painful.
Can you imagine having 6 kids anyway?
What I did instead was pour my heart and soul into the family I was blessed with. Naturally, I still pray every day for the safety of my family.
Sometimes ““Just in Case”” stops us from living fully or engaging fully.
Think about the man who keeps his little black book just in case things don’t work out in the relationship. Can he be 100% committed to the relationship if he keeps the escape hatch close at hand?
I’ve coached more than one person afraid of intimate relationships. As soon as things started getting serious, they would somehow sabotage the relationship just in case they ended up getting hurt again.
These kinds of “Just in Case” thought-patterns have the positive intention of protecting us and at the same time they often keep us from living fully.
Awareness is the first step
You’ve probably heard me say this before: awareness is the first step in changing.
Self-reflection is the only way you’ll unearth your “Just in Case” thought-patterns.
Start noticing when you say “Just in Case” just in case it’s serious. (OK OK sorry!!!)
Start noticing when you say “Just in case”, whether it’s inside your head or to someone else.
Second step Self-Reflection
When you discover a “Just in Case” thought-pattern, ask yourself these questions:
- What is this thought-pattern protecting me from?
- How is this “Just in Case” thinking holding me back?
- How would my life be if I let it go?
Some “Just in Cases” may not have such a serious impact. Others could prevent you from living fully.
Now let it go
Once you start noticing your “Just in Case” thought-patterns you can decide to keep them or to change them.
Doing this allows you to living more intentionally and more fully.
Now: “Just in Case” you have read this whole article, I would like to say, “Thanks for being a loyal reader! I appreciate you very much.”
Please share your “Just in Case” stories so we can all grow in awareness and learning.