3 Ways to Create Possibililty

Posted on 28 November 2012 by Kirsten

Language opens or closes possibilities for how we engage in the world.

The common wisdom we all know about is being correct if we say “I can’t” and also being correct if we say “I can”.

Recently I worked with a new manager on her assertiveness. She felt that people weren’t taking her seriously and often ignored her requests. Changing the language she used when delegating a task made a huge difference to  her effectiveness.

Manager: “So sorry to bother you, do you mind if I ask you a favour? If you get a chance, could you do this for me”

Can you imagine what is going on in the employee’s head? “Yes, you are bothering me and NO, you can’t ask me a favour. Can’t you see I’m busy?” Can you hear the begging tone of the manager’s sentence? The manager’s language tells the person being addressed that the manager is uncomfortable about asking and probably wouldn’t deal with the situation if the work wasn’t done. The chances of this employee doing the task are pretty slim.

Manager: “Please can you do this task. I want on my desk by midday Friday”

This a much better! The employee knows what to do and when it is needed. The possibility of getting the work done is much greater than in the previous example.

The words we use have a huge impact on how we experience something. This manager was experiencing difficulties with her employees until she changed the language she used when dealing with them.

The manager asked what would she have to change in order to delegate more effectively. Instead of saying, “I can’t delegate’, she looked inside to find out what to change so that effective delegation became possible.

Your language creates your reality. Depending on the language you use, you shut out possibility or you create possibility.

Change your language to create possibility:

  1. Stop blaming others and take accountability.  Rather than saying “You don’t understand”, say “I haven’t explained well, let me try again”. Rather than “You make me sad”, say “I am feeling sad because …”. Being accountable opens the possibilities for change – the only change you can make is to something YOU are saying, thinking, doing, feeling…
  2. Separate facts and opinions. Choosing your behavior based on your opinions or assumption closes down possibilities. Basing your behavior on facts gives you possibilities. Try this: write down everything you can about a difficult situation. Write down  at least 20-50 sentences. Have a break – then go back and cross out all the assumptions/ judgements/ opinions. Write the remaining facts on a clean sheet of paper. Study them and ask “Now, what is possible?”
  3. Being present to what is, without resistance, creates possibility. Let’s say you’re on holiday in a beautiful, sunny place,and it pours with rain for days. “But it’s not supposed to rain. We’ve spent all this money, BUT now we can’t enjoy ourselves. Our holiday is ruined. There’s nothing to do”. Don’t go on and on complaining about something you can’t change.  What is, is. Let go of the resistance and look at the possibilities. “Oh, it’s raining and we weren’t expecting it. What’s possible if its raining? How can we have fun even though it’s raining?” – possibilities open up when you let go of resistance and ask a different question. Now you can enjoy a duvet day – books, chocolate, rest, relaxation… AND, perhaps,  the best sex ever….

Become more aware of the sentences you use.

Does your language close down possibility?

Does your language create possibility?

How about sharing your experiences with your use of language.What possibilities open up now?

“Anytime words alone stop you

from doing what is important to you

- change the words”

Moshe Feldenkreis

 

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Posted in Good habits, Life Mastery, Thought Patterns | 1 Comment

Quick, before November ends, do two things….

Posted on 6 November 2012 by Kirsten

“How did it get so late so soon?
It’s night before it’s afternoon.
December is here before it’s June.
My goodness how the time has flewn.
How did it get so late so soon?”
-Dr. Seuss

 My all-time favourite author, Dr Seuss, expresses so well those feelings of anxiety and overwhelm that accompany this time of year. How often have you thought, “Where has the year gone?”

Things will get more frantic. You know that. I know that: Year-end functions, Christmas shopping, companies closing for the festive season (for my non-South African readers: Christmas falls at the height of our summer; this is when the schools and varsities have their extended summer holidays; many companies close down between Christmas and New Year; many families go on their annual holiday at this time) , contracts to be completed, holiday plans, meal plans, long trips, dealing with relatives, mosquitoes and sunburn…

What can you do to keep a modicum of calm, control and composure?

1) Reflect

The more frantic you become, the more important it is to take a daily 10-20 minutes of non-negotiable time for reflection. Non-negotiable means that you declare, you decide, you CHOOSE to take that time no matter what. Think about what has been accomplished. Get a sense of what you have learned this year and how you have grown. Reflect on what actions you can take that will leave you feeling complete and satisfied with your progress for the year. There is still time.

If your anxiety feels out of hand do breathing exercises or listen to a guided meditation. Your task for this time is to get yourself into a grounded, calm space so that you can get through your day in an effective manner – you will know the best way that this can be achieved. Sometimes I sit with my morning cup of tea in the garden and just enjoy – even this gets me grounded for the day ahead.

2) Prioritize.

One of the reasons many of us experience feelings of overwhelm at this time of year is that there is so much to do, and less time to do it in. There is often a deadline – the day you go on leave – and everything must be done by then. The last sentence is the crux of the problem – everything must be done by then.

Utter nonsense!

Know this: you cannot do more in a day than the number of hours in that day. (We do know that, don’t we?) Take a look at what you would LIKE to accomplish by the time you go on leave and choose to do these things first.

Operating in choice and awareness from a state of calm and composure will get you through the next frantic weeks most effectively.

What will you choose to do so that you experience a sense of satisfaction and completeness before the year is up?

How will you choose to live out the last few weeks of the year?

Will you choose calm and composure OR anxiety and overwhelm?

You decide.
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Posted in Life Mastery, Stress, Time management | 2 Comments

Jason Mraz does it for me

Posted on 24 October 2012 by Kirsten

She was dressed beautifully. Her face shone with passion as she spoke to us of her journey fighting cancer.  She told us one of the things that kept her going was her ‘Lift Me Up’ play list. She collected music and songs that made her feel good, and would listen to them when she was feeling down.

Although this was many years ago and I can’t remember her name, I loved the idea so recently I started a Life Mastery playlist.

What? You might ask..

This playlist contains songs with powerful, inspirational and uplifting lyrics.

Part of Life Mastery is the ability to change your emotional state when the state you are not a resourceful one. And music can help to do that…

Last week  I added some Jason  Mraz songs to my list. My favorite is called ’93 Million Miles.’

What a wonderful message in this song!

He sings about remembering his mom telling him that he’ll go far, but he can always come home. When he was young his dad had told him a similar thing. Now that he is older he has made an important discovery. This one simple sentence explains it all:

Looking deeper through the telescope
You can see that your home’s inside of you.

 Everything you need you have inside. You have all the resources you require to live a meaningful life. The treasure you are searching for is in your heart. ( This reminds me of a favourite book of mine called ‘The Alchemist’ by Paulo Coelho)

So, yes, Jason Mraz  is young And sexy – but that’s not what does it for me…  Truly!

It’s his lyrics! :-)

So… I’m a building up my collection of Life Mastery songs. If you know of a good song with powerful and meaningful lyrics, please share….

Have a great week,
Kirsten
Your Coach 4 Life
 
Posted in Life Mastery | 1 Comment

It is NOT ALLOWED in Germany. In Amsterdam, it is.

Posted on 11 October 2012 by Kirsten

After 3 days in Germany, I felt like a child again. NOT in a good way.

We had been shouted at by angry Germans so often.

Things that were pretty acceptable to us, were NOT ALLOWED in Germany.

Our group of 8 squeezed round a table for 4 in a busy restaurant. NOT ALLOWED!

We moved 2 tables together in another restaurant.  NOT ALLOWED!

We wanted to celebrate someone’s birthday by opening a bottle of champagne at our hotel reception area. We asked if we could pay corkage. NOT ALLOWED!

I saw a tourist in a shop get shouted at too – he looked at the fridge magnets at the counter instead of the ones displayed on the wall.

“NOT ALLOWED”, the shop assistant shouted. “These are MINE.”

In another shop, I picked up a T-shirt off the pile instead of looking at the one on the wall. NOT ALLOWED!

We may annoyed a lot of people, but we still had loads of beer. Oops I mean fun! (It was the Oktoberfest, after all.)

Nonetheless, I wasn’t too sad to leave. I am not used to being shouted at like that. I am certainly not used to being treated like a naughty child.

THEN…..

We flew to Amsterdam! Well, anything and everything goes in Amsterdam. And no-one shouts (except the sad addicts)

It did feel like we had arrived at the other extreme.

Weed, drugs and sex available freely all over the place. Well not quite free, but freely available! It was quite an eye-opener.

My husband and I wandered into  ‘The Other Side” coffee shop looking for breakfast one morning. It was empty but that didn’t put us off. We sat at a table next to the window and waited for someone to take our order.

Then we noticed a small sign next to each table: These tables are reserved for people buying weed from this establishment.

I thought it was a joke, but the joke was on me.

When three young girls walked in, asking for cappuccino, the man behind the counter asked for their ID’s! This seemed quite peculiar.

Looking more closely (and realizing there was no food anywhere ), getting something ‘breakfasty’ to eat here obviously wasn’t going to happen. So we ducked.

We found a friendly coffee shop on a busy street and enjoyed crispy croissants and coffee. No ID required!

So we had fun in Amsterdam too. We didn’t annoy anyone either. But after visiting “The Other Side” I did check out each place carefully before I entered.

As I headed home, I reflected on the two extremes. I couldn’t remember being shouted at by anyone back home nor have I inadvertently wandered into a coffee shop selling only weed.

At O.R. Tambo passport control a large lady with a wide smile welcomed us home. My heart smiled too. I love coming home.

There is comfort between the extremes. Here in SA we do not get shouted at in restaurants and shops. If I wanted to get weed, drugs and illicit sex I could probably find it, but it’s not in my face every day.

Each country has a shadow side, and we certainly have ours, but this is the place I know and love.

Going to the other extreme may be invigorating and exciting, but coming home is always better.

So by all means, go to the other extreme – and then enjoy coming back…

“It is only through extremes
that men can arrive at the middle path
of wisdom and virtue.”
Wilhelm von Humboldt

 

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Posted in Life Mastery, Love your life | 6 Comments

The Joy of Directing Your Thoughts

Posted on 19 September 2012 by Kirsten

You can’t control your thoughts but you can direct them.

Thoughts will pop into your head uninvited – all day long. I don’t really know where they come from or how they get there. A lot of these uninvited thoughts are OK – they help us to manage our day, to make decisions what to do next and to evaluate what it going on.

However, some of these uninvited thoughts may be destructive. These are the ones you MUST let go of as soon as possible.

How will you know if your thoughts are destructive? Become aware of your feelings when you think those thoughts.

I have a habit of getting into destructive thought patterns after I have listened to the news. Often there is news of violent crimes. I few hours later I run scenarios though my head of the same or similar things happening to me and my family. My heart races, I physically experience the fear and anxiety in my stomach and by breathing becomes shallow. My whole body tenses up.

Now there may be some merit in scenario planning, but I don’t think it’s beneficial for me to get into such a state of panic. This fear I experience is called “dirty fear” – the situation is not happening right now, yet the fear I am feeling is real. At the moment in time that I am thinking these thoughts, I am safe. There is not any purpose for these frightening thoughts.

As soon as I become aware of this, I kindly and gently say to myself: “Ok Kirst, that’s enough. None of this is happening so let those thoughts evaporate.”

I take some deep breaths, I shake myself and I consciously direct my thoughts to more constructive places. I usually start thinking about what I am going to do next for my Online Life Mastery site. Or I start planning my weekend away or next holiday. Sometimes I visualize God or the angels putting a protective coat around me and my family. It doesn’t really matter what I do – as long as it’s constructive.

In no time at all, my heart rate and breathing return to normal and I’m feeling better.

Directing your thoughts means deciding what you’re going to think about, and then thinking about that.

Here are some suggestions of things you can think about when you need to direct your thoughts:

  1. Your work – especially an aspect of your work that you love or are planning to do. You could even think about a challenge at work and how you can overcome it (but make sure you direct your thoughts constructively)
  2. Your family – think about the people you really care for, and how you can affirm to them the value they are adding to your life.
  3. Helping someone – think of some ways that you can add value to someone else’s life. It doesn’t have to be something huge – often the small little things you do for someone make a huge difference.
  4. Being grateful – you may choose to pray and give thanks – or you may want to list 25 things that you truly appreciate.
  5. Meditate – this will allow you to become present, for your thoughts and emotions to become calm.
  6. Visualize – how your life will be when you have achieve a certain goal. Or visualize your perfect day – putting in every detail and bringing in all the senses.
  7. Listen to your favorite uplifting song. Focus on the words. Sing along if you can.

These are some ways you can purposefully direct your thoughts.

Joy comes from directing your thoughts constructively. Practice doing this often – and especially when you become aware of thinking dark and destructive thoughts – don’t linger there, move on immediately.

Let me know what you do to consciously direct your thoughts…… There is so much to learn form each other – so share!

Change your thoughts and you change your world. 
Norman Vincent Peale

 

Posted in Life Mastery, Thought Patterns | 2 Comments

WARNING: You must know the difference between stress and anxiety

Posted on 11 September 2012 by Kirsten

Why must you know the difference between stress and anxiety?

Because they should be treated differently. Treating stress as anxiety may be OK, but treating anxiety as stress can actually do more damage and exacerbate the anxiety.

What is the difference?

  • Stress is a product of every day life; anxiety is primitive.
  • Stress can be controlled; anxiety cannot be controlled.
  • Stress happens in the cortex part of the brain; anxiety happens in the limbic part of the brain.
  • Stress and anxiety are often experienced in different parts of the body
  • Stress is physical while anxiety is emotional.
  • Stress is choice-based; anxiety is not.
  • Stress is about coping; anxiety is about survival.

My experience of stress and anxiety

I feel stress in my shoulders and neck. When I am stressed my shoulder muscles bunch up tightly. If I ignore it, I eventually end up at the chiropractor and having needles stuck all over my back. When I take proper care of myself, I have a sports massage (you’re probably thinking “Oh that’s so nice” – believe me, it is anything but nice!!) which straightens out and loosens the muscles.

I feel anxiety in my diaphragm and it’s a very strong sensation usually accompanied by fear.

What to do with stress

Stress means that your life has to be managed. You need to change something so that you are able to cope better with life. You need to work with pacing – what are the different aspects of your life and what do you need to do more or less of…

Much of my coaching revolves around helping clients to cope better with their load – delegating/ shifting/ saying no/ asking for support/ not working on weekends are some of the actions my clients adopt.

What to do with anxiety.

Anxiety is a warning system. You should never ‘try to get rid of it’ because it is essential to your survival. Anxiety is usually appropriate. It’s like an alarm bell that rings that tells you that your survival is at stake.

There are different levels of anxiety depending on what is happening. Imagine the anxiety that you may experience crossing a busy road, or being held up at gun-point, or discovering that you’ve been retrenched or realizing that your best friend has betrayed you. A coach can hep you to work with these anxious feelings.

Your anxiety helps you to make a good decision in the moment and to deal with the situation. Never try to ‘fix’ your anxiety. Rather listen to it and work with it.

Of course, sometimes it feels like the alarm won’t switch off, and you may find your anxiety has become intolerable - you can’t bear to be parted from someone or you can’t manage to do any work or you feel abandoned by everyone or you feel terrified and petrified most of the time or wake up full of dread every morning.

If you are experiencing this kind of anxiety it is imperative to get help – ask your GP for a referral OR  visit a psychotherapist – these people are trained to help you deal with those overpowering feelings. Don’t delay – the sooner you get help the better.

Take some action

Knowing the difference between stress and anxiety is important because they need to be treated differently. Treating anxiety by trying to cope better or changing things so that you can cope better will only increase your anxiety. Make sure you are coping with your stress by changing some of your behaviours. See a coach or psychotherapist if you need help with this. A coach can also help you to deal with your anxiety – but if it is intolerable, it would be better to see a psychotherapist. You know best what you need.

“Its not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” 

Hans Selye

Whether it is stress or anxiety – do take some action to deal with it.

How do you copy with stress and / anxiety?

Share your experiences so we can all benfit by commenting below….

Posted in Life Mastery, Stress | Tagged | 8 Comments

How to keep your head during stormy times…

Posted on 30 August 2012 by Kirsten

August has been pretty frantic… and awesome too.

I spent a lot of time in the company of one of the most amazing people I know: Jay Barlow from London. He has a string of degrees and diplomas behind his name and knows more about the human psyche than anyone else I know. I organised for him to run coaching workshops in Cape Town and Johannesburg – and I learnt so much (more of which I’ll tell you later…)

Then we spent a few lazy, relaxed and stress-free days in Imfolozi Game reserve. It was here that I observed a bird with built-in shock-absorbers!

As we went on a late-afternoon drive, we spotted a brown-hooded kingfisher sitting on a low branch close to the road. It was a hot (41 degrees!), dusty and windy day . My husband was photographing it when he suddenly exclaimed “Look how still he keeps his head”. Then we saw it too: his head was dead-still. The rest of his body moved up and down as the branch was blown about in the wind. It was quite an extraordinary sight to see!

Makes sense too – that kingfisher (which eats insects!) would have to keep its head pretty still to focus on the insect it was about to swoop down upon.

Fancy that! A kingfisher with shock-absorbers.

Imagine how useful it would be for us to have shock-absorbers so that we can keep our focus when life is blowing us about in the wind (and even when its not).

Well we can…

Here are 3 activities you can introduce to your daily life that’ll help you deal with light, moderate or stormy winds in a way that keeps you focused:

1) Half hour morning reflection: I know an hour is ideal, but even ten minutes is better than nothing. Use this time to journal, pray, reflect, visualize or meditate. It never ceases to amaze me how this time sets the tone for the whole day and how I cope much better with the trials of life when I do this regularly.

2) Take care of yourself: When your needs are met in terms of your health, your mind and your soul, you are able to give so much more to your life and the people in it. Make an effort to put those activities into your life that count towards your own care. After this upside down month, I can’t wait to get back to regular gym and intend to go for a massage to iron out these knots…

3) A night-time routine that ensures sleep: DO NOT answer emails/ work just before you go to bed – unless you enjoy spending half the night processing work issues. I encourage you to stop working before dinner. Then truly switch off from the work-day. It helps to write down all the things that are bothering you or irritating you and then putting the list away, promising to deal with it tomorrow. Now do the things that relax you. Avoid TV too close to bed-time too. It really works to have a bed-time routing that you repeat before you sleep every night. This helps your mind and body KNOW that it must sleep now. It could be something like: Have a warm drink; bath/ wash and brush teeth; turn off lights in rest of house; get into bed and read a novel (NOT work stuff) or write in your journal; sleep…. Getting a decent night’s sleep ensures you are ready to face your life in a constructive way.

These shock absorbers are important. By practicing these, you can keep your focus,even when the wind is howling. I know that these work for me, and when I don’t do them I start to feel ungrounded and hugely stressed. As soon as I put them back into my daily life I feel grounded and focused again.

Of course, you may do something else that works perfectly for you. Why don’t you share the rituals that help to keep you focused so that others reading this blog can benefit from your  ideas too? (and me…)

One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want

 is that we never direct our focus;

we never concentrate our power.

Most people dabble their way through life,

never deciding to master anything in particular.

Tony Robbins

Posted in Good habits, Life Mastery | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments

5 Ways to Stop Wasting Time

Posted on 31 July 2012 by Kirsten

A guest post by M.Farouk Radwan
The founder of http://www.2knowmyself.com

Time, as we all know, is one of the most precious assets we have. Even though most people are aware of this fact they keep wasting their time then end up feeling guilty because they haven’t achieved any of their goals.

In order to be successful in life you must develop certain skills and one of these skills is being time conscious.

In other words you need to be aware of the passage of time and you must obsess a little about the time you waste.

 So the question is, how can you stop wasting time?

 Here are some tips :

 1) Remove all distractions: try to monitor your behavior for a few days to find out the things that distract you. Once you find those things remove them the moment you attempt to do an important task. If your mobile phone distracts you then turn it off, if your email distracts you then cut the Internet connection and so on.

 2) Wake up early: the earlier you wake the more time you will have and the more tasks you will get done. People waste precious time sleeping then wonder why they don’t have enough time. Waking up early is one of the best time-saving methods a person can come up with since it brings extra time out of nowhere!

 3) Are you afraid to start? Believe it or not, the fear of failure or the fear of testing the self esteem is one of the reasons you procrastinate.  Any person who is afraid to try something will feel guilty if he decides not to do it and, at the same time, frustrated by not having the courage to start and will often spiral between the two feelings by procrastinating. Be brave and you will save yourself a lot of time.

 4) Lock yourself up: sometimes you will find yourself motivated to work but others will distract you. Often a family member or a friend will distracts you during the time you want to be productive. So locking yourself up is a must if you want to get the important tasks done.

 5) Don’t wait for the mood: many people wait for the right mood in order to start. People who get the tasks done are the ones who work in spite of the bad moods. Procrastinators keep waiting for the right time or  the right mood . It won’t happen – so do it anyway.

What works best for you in terms of managing your time?

I’d love to hear your ideas. Email me on kirsten@coach4life.co.za OR post a comment…

Remember:

small changes = big results!

Posted in Good habits, Life Mastery, Time management | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

I challenge you in honour of Stephen R. Covey

Posted on 18 July 2012 by Kirsten

I challenge you today  in honour of Stephen Covey

RIP

“The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing”

When I heard that Stephen R. Covey passed away on the 16th July, I felt truly sad , and then grateful for the wisdom sitting on my bookshelves  which will always be available to me and to you.

Naturally I took our one of the well-leafed books off the shelf this morning and flicked through it, reminding me of the aspects I have learnt from him that I have incorporated into my life (and the ones that I am still working on!)

For me, the emotional bank account is one of the most useful aspects I learnt from Stephen Covey.

Understanding and incorporating the emotional bank account is the most powerful way to keep your relationships on track and healthy:

  • Make deposits into the other person’s emotional bank account on a daily basis.
  • Deposits include: courtesy, kindness, honesty, respect, integrity, affirmations, acts of service, involvement etc…. there are many more.
  • Make sure the your balance in the other persons emotions bank account is healthy and positive.
  • Make sure the deposits you make are meaningful for the other person and not only meaningful for you. If you don’t know where to start, get hold of “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman.
  • When the bank balance is high, the other person will trust you.
  • When the bank balance is overdrawn, you will be given little flexibility for mistakes from the other person.
  • Keep withdrawals to the minimum.
  • Withdrawals include: discourtesy, disrespect, unkindness, ignoring, not listening, betrayals, gossiping about the person etc… there are many more.

You have an emotional bank account with EVERONE that you have a relationship with – including yourself!

What are the withdrawals you make from your own emotional bank account? – Sabotage, excuses, lack of discipline, lack of self-belief, over-indulgence, behaviour conflicting with your values, laziness, procrastination….

What are your most common withdrawals? What are you going to do about it?

What deposits do you make into your own emotional bank account? – keeping promises, being accountable to self, spending time on reflection, eating healthily, regular exercise….

What are the 5 deposits you would benefit from doing more of? What are you going to do about it?

In honour of the passing of Stephen R. Covey, my challenge to you (and myself) is the following:

  • Think about your various relationships. Find one where the balance is negative, and make a deposit every day for the next 7 days.
  • Make a daily deposit into your own bank account for the next 30 days.
  • Keep a record of any shifts that occur.

May your life have many deposits and few withdrawals….

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Posted in Good habits, Life Mastery, Relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

How resourceful is your way of being in the world?

Posted on 10 July 2012 by Kirsten

How resourceful is your way of being in the world?

You have developed a habitual way of being in the world. This is your way of coping and dealing with your life. Some people have a more effective way of being in the world than others.

Look at it like this: your life flows along quite happily until an event happens that interrupts this flow. How you handle this interruption has a direct impact on your overall happiness and contentment.

Some interruptions are minor – like spilling your coffee.

Some interruptions are major – like discovering a serious illness.

Interruptions can be welcome – like getting promoted.

Interruptions can be unwelcome – like getting retrenched.

It helps to realize that interruptions will happen – on a regular basis. And it’s how you deal with them that makes a difference to your overall wellbeing.

Life mastery is about dealing effectively with these interruptions. It’s a life-long journey where you are always learning – about yourself, about your way of being in the world and about how to transform your way of being in the world when necessary.

There are two different aspects to life-mastery:

  1. Self-authoring is re-shaping your way of being in the face of difficulties. For example – when I am upset I get into a state of high-anxiety. This way of being does not serve me well, because I become very distracted and lack focus. I have learnt over time (and I am by no means an expert at this) that taking 10-15 minutes in the mornings for quiet reflection helps to ground me. If I do this on a regular basis, I focus and work much more effectively.
  2. Self-transformation involves self-authoring – it is a fundamental change in your way of being. It could be moving from a dominant mood of resentment to one of acceptance OR moving from a dominant mood of resignation to one of ambition. Self-transformation is consciously changing your fundamental way of being in the world, to a more resourceful way of being in the world.

Self-transformation is a big shift and takes place over time as you learn about yourself and grow in awareness about yourself. Self-authoring is about making small changes on a daily basis that allow you to live more effectively. Self-authoring contributes to your self-transformation.

This then is the journey of self-mastery…

It is about finding your most resourceful way of being in the world and constantly making small changes that move you closer to this resourcefulness.

I invite you to begin your journey today with a moment of quiet reflection:

  •  What is going on for you right now in your thoughts?
  •  What is going on for you right now in your emotions?
  •  What is going on right now for you in your physiology (Your body)?

Look at what is going on for you and decide on a small change that you can take today which will allow your life to flow more easily. Commit to making that change.

Self-mastery begins with reflection and action… Start today and enjoy the journey.

 “Happiness is when what you think, what you say,

and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi

 

Kirsten Long
Your Coach 4 Life
 

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